I’m One of the muses, A common wood nymph roaming around Parnassus, Happy with my little sweet pea. With her delicate, fragrant flowers Carried on long, slim stalks, She captivated me. I ran to her flaming with desire. I am flaming. Burning Blazing with desire. Too hot for my sweet pea. Because she’s so delicate, So delicate for me. As I touch her, she transformed into ashes. I burnt her. And out of a haze, you were formed. Like smoke given out by fire. A fireweed that sprang up in the burnt over area. A replacement, I thought. You quenched my thirst. Suffuse my hunger. My desire. I came to you for a crown And you gave me a kingdom. You made me eat on a golden plate And drink from your cup of diamonds. But like a common pitcher plant, Cut your base open And there you’ll find my body’s remains trapped inside. A pitfall in the middle of the forest. I will name you Venus? The goddess with a seducing brilliant red trap. Open to all beings that needs nurturing. Show your bosom and all will crave for your milk. From a butterfly, you turned me to an ant. When I brushed only slightly against your skin, You closed within an instant. Rigid spines on the margins of you blades interlock tightly. As soon as I was trapped, You digested me. Used me as a nutrient material. I know this is about to last for only a week. By the time your leaf reopens, You’ll be reedy for other sufferers. Trapped inside, I accepted my fate. Then there she came one spring day. My little delicate sweet pea. Now a spring beauty in full bloom. A low perennial herb. With narrow, succulent leaves And loose cluster of white and pink flowers. But your leaf has closed. I cannot escape.

Fangirl 11.5  

7/23/2009

Back for an update! Oh yeah,fyi, this is the really REALLY post b-day fic for Yossie..Ahaahhaha.. It's mostly in her POv and after reading this, I know you'll get the plot of the story.. So yeah...it's 11.5 because it's not the main story (which focuses on Rika)but a side story... and then it's somewhat a song fic too for I inserted the translation of Kataomoi chiisana koi of Tegomass... I guess it means One sided little love... or something. Anyways, enjoy this cheesy~ update.




It’s almost midnight when the girls decided to stop playing basketball. They were drenched in sweat as they sat in the nearest bench.

“That was one hell of a game!” Miki exclaimed. She can’t believe that Aya and Maki would team up against her. It was a handicap match which she welcomed at first. She thought that she would win easily as Maki was busy with her tight schedule and Aya changed her sports to Futsal. She now realized the huge error she made. “Geez, are you sure you’re a busy person? Because it seemed that you’re better now than before!” Miki said while playfully glaring at Maki.

“Yeah. I’m pretty busy right now.” Maki replied nonchalantly. “It’s in the genes.”

Miki sighed and looked at Aya. “And you? What’s your reason?”

“Ahhh,” Aya became silent for a few seconds, “I don’t know. Maybe because my body still knows how to play it. You know, there are certain things that are really hard to forget.” Aya looked at Maki. She wanted to ask Miki something that’s been bothering her since their lunch. Maki got the hidden message in Aya’s pleading look.

“Hey, I’ll go get some refreshments back at home. I’ll be back later.” Miki wanted to go with her but Aya pulled her back.

“Are you going to leave me here alone?”

“But Maki’s alone now. We should accompany her! Who knows, there might be paparazzis here… or a wota stalker or….”

“Or you’re just having a hard time distinguishing the reality from fantasy.” Miki looked at Aya questioningly. “Look, you REALLY like to read lots of fanfics and sometimes, you mixed it up with what’s really happening now. This is Maki’s neighborhood. She’s safe here.” Miki thought for a while. Has she really been too engrossed in her own world? She was about to dispute it when Aya added something.

“And besides, I want to talk with you, alone.”

“Ehh? Me?” Miki pointed at herself.

“Yes, you. You saw her?” Aya queried. Miki was really confused at what her friend was talking about.

“Uhh, may I ask… who’s her?”

“Her! Your mentor! Did you see her in the store when we’re buying our drinks? Don’t deny it.”

“Mentor…mentor… mentor…” Miki mumbled as she tried to remember the person Aya was telling her.

“Come on… the one who taught you how to play basketball… the reason why you’re so engrossed in Three-Tums… and the reason why you decided to change the branch of your office… DO I NEED TO TELL YOU MORE?” At this, Miki’s eyes widened.

“Di… did she see me?” Aya sighed. Her friend didn’t have the slightest idea about the topic.

“I guess. She accidentally poured her coffee on her shirt when she saw you… that’s really funny!” Aya laughed as she remembered the earlier scenario. She stopped when she noticed that Miki’s face was expressionless. She turned serious and decided to ask what’s been bugging her for a long time. “Nee, Miki. I’m your friend right? So could you tell me what really happened between you and Yoshizawa-san?”

……………………

“Hey! Did you wait for too long? I over slept a little.”

“No, not really I just got here. So… what do you want me to teach you?”

“Hmm, I want to learn how you do those fancy crossovers. I’ll show Maki and Aya that I’m better than them!”

“Yeah, sure. If you can just shut your mouth and do more training, then your dreams of beating them will come true.”

“Yochhan!!! You’re really mean!”

I love you so much that I can't sleep
This little love will not come true
It is you, it's you
I slip into the futon but


I sat up from my bed. It was just 30 minutes since I fell asleep and I’m already dreaming about my past. Miki… The girl who changed my life.

I always see her playing basketball after school. She was like me, dedicated and passionate about our sport. I was enjoying watching her at first, but after many days of just watching from afar, I gathered my courage and joined her.

Your side profile is so bright
I can't reach it at all
I have to forget you, but I can't forget you
It is flooding my heart


Miki Fujimoto, the next-to-be captain of your school’s basketball club. The way you talk, and the way you persevered on your practice says it all. You treated me as your mentor but I knew, one day you’ll even surpass me.

“GAAAH!!! HE’S REALLY CUTE!!!” I was surprised to hear you squeal for the first time. I look weirdly at you.

“Ehh? Where? Who’s cute?”

“My friend’s little brother. His name is Yuki Goto. He walked with us earlier… Kyaah!!! He’s so cool!”

“Uhh, ok… I thought your fangirl side is only for Double U?”

“Yeah… but there’s always an exception.” I laughed. “Hey, you heard about the new girl group in town? They are just starting but man, they’re good.”

“Ehh? What’s their name?”

“I bet it’s Three-Tums…” I saw your pretty eyes widened with surprise.

“MY GAAAHH!!! THREE-TUMS!!! YES!!! They’re really good!!! And CUTE TOO!!!”

“From Double U to Yuki… to Three-Tums… you’re the Queen of Randomness.”

“But they’re good! I already bought their first single. I also made a forum for them.”

“Give me the link! I want to see your forum!” This made me happy inside. At last, I’ll see your real fangirl side. The pure 100% of it, but then…

“No way! Find it out yourself.”


If there's an end to this unrequited love
Please tell me
I want you to notice this unrequited love
This is a love that cannot be reversed


We spent a lot of time together, from high school to college. You introduced your friends to me and we always played basketball. As the time pass by, you’re starting to confuse me. My mind wished that you won’t notice it…but my heart tells otherwise. I’m hoping for something that would never happen in real life.

"What's wrong? You look down"
You ask with a worried face
It is you, it's because of you
I shut my words in my desk but


I tried to focus on my work so as to avert these thoughts of you. I didn’t notice that by doing so, I’m starting to distance myself from you.

“Hey, is there something wrong? Don’t tell me, it’s about that new project Mr. Nishida was talking about?”

“Yeah… that’s why I’m really busy right now.”

“Geez, you have no time for fun anymore. I bet you want to become the president of this company right? Well, bad news for you… Mr. Ishikawa has a daughter and from what I heard from Mr. Nishida… She’s really good.”

“I’ll be better.. Now go away and leave me alone.”

Your words are so gentle
I look down with a flushed face
My heart wavers inside


“Ok, I’ll leave you alone now. But don’t forget to eat your lunch. Here, I made an extra bento for you.”

You still worry about me even though it’s obvious that I’m pushing you away. I can’t deny it any longer. I’m 100% sure about this. I really fell in love with you.

If there isn't an end to this unrequited love
I'm okay with it
Let me protect this unrequited love
Still unable to do anything
That's me

If I did confess to you
I won't be able to see your smile anymore
Just watching you from afar
I don't mind it



I still can’t sleep… the memories were still hunting me. If I wasn’t drunk at that time, I bet, you wouldn’t go away… I sighed loudly, even though I’m the only person who can hear it. I have made up my mind. I stood up and went to my laptop to open it. I need to finish my story… our story..

TBC


PS: kataomoi also means unrequited... so I guess the english title is unrequited love..XD

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2 comments: to “ Fangirl 11.5

  • Anonymous
    July 24, 2009 at 1:56 AM  

    ZOMG! I LOVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVvvvvvv----err let's not get ahead of ourselves. IT WAS AWESOME - quiet inner me! BUT IT WAS - shhhoooosh! Ahemm, it was quite franklY JUST PLAIN AWESOME! - SHUT UP INNER ME! - MAKE ME - I WILL! - TRY ME PUNK!

    -----This broadcast is interrupted due to intense fangirling which could not be contained. This fangirlishness crept up slowly and imobilised the host, taking over the hosts' body and forcing it to type crazy things. This post will be resumed when the host and the fangirling side reach a compromise-----

  • yushiro909
    September 3, 2009 at 7:49 PM  

    Whoa! a yomiki.....rika's in the middle!

    GOMATTO?! eh! that was unexpected....for me! haha

    whaw! im becoming the character of rika now...."a fan girl" being addicted to anime then to j-pop! lurking to some forums never writing a review but then....decided to write one 2 years ago@ lol

    buttom line! this fic is epic! update soon! and oh! thanks to that trailer u uploaded to YT, if it wasnt for it, i wouldnt be here right now typing a review!

    kya! love this! update soon! just realized! im becoming fond of rokkies! haha

    CHARMIKITTY! please author-san!

 

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